Published in Long. Sweet. Valuable. November 19, 2023
Feature Photo by Atikh Bana on Unsplash
As the joke goes, vegans have a habit of informing the world of their lifestyle choices. I know that when I first swapped steak for seitan 5 years ago, I was excited to share my enthusiasm (seriously, I love steak, and I never thought I could live without it). Be that as it may, I quickly learned that telling others about my plant-based lifestyle caused some people to feel like I was attacking theirs.
As a non-confrontational type of person, this was never my intention. I was just genuinely pumped to have found a lifestyle that worked better for my health, my budget, the environment, and the animals that I love. But going forward, I found myself refraining more and more from mentioning my plant-based lifestyle.
And apparently, I’m not the only one.
If you Google ‘Why I Hate Telling People I’m Vegan’ you’ll find numerous Reddit posts by plant-based people who admit to avoiding vegan discussions altogether to curb criticism or divert yet another debate. Reddit user Geoffrey_Chaucer says:
“I’ve received more abuse from going vegan than I have about still having the tattoo of my ex-girlfriend’s name on my forearm.”
Ouch.
So how can you tell someone’s vegan if they don’t always tell you? Through my own experiences and getting to know other vegans, here’s the common ground I’ve found (follow along for some self-telling exposure).
They Don’t Seem to Eat a Lot
Do you ever offer someone food and they almost always decline? Or maybe you rarely see them eat? Think of a work colleague, for instance, who shies away to eat their lunch in their car or eats at their work desk.
You may have a vegan on your hands.
Work luncheons or employee appreciation events can be the hairiest when you’re getting free food because no one sane passes up free food. Though unless I know for sure it’s safe, my favorite go-to responses are, “I’m full” or “I just ate” with an added thank you for politeness.
Sometimes this is true, which is discussed more below, and sometimes it’s not – in which case I pray my stomach doesn’t grumble and give me away. But in most cases, I’m stuffing my face behind the scenes with something both delicious and good for me.
Ingredient labels are a vegan’s best friend, and if they don’t know what ingredients are in the food you’re offering, it gives them less of a headache to just pass it up versus explaining why they can’t or won’t eat it.
They’ll Eat Before an Event
From birthday parties to wedding receptions, most likely they’ll eat beforehand. This isn’t to be rude, but on the contrary, to not place pressure on the event hosts that know they’re vegan, but maybe forgot, or don’t have it in their budget to accommodate.
I’ve gone to a couple of weddings where I ate Taco Bell during the lull when photographs are taken (it’s really a lifesaver). But I’ve also gone to a wedding where there was a vegan meal option, which I knew of in advance, so I made sure to not eat to avoid spoiling dinner service.
Plant-based people don’t expect to be thought of in these circumstances but are both surprised and appreciative when they are.
They’ll Bring Their Own Snacks or Food
Nothing’s more awkward than going to a gathering where food is the center of attention, and you don’t eat. So, in instances when the event is food-focused such as a family cookout or a holiday party, they’ll usually bring their own food.
I’ve personally brought my own veggie patties to grill up at my in-laws, brought over my own pre-cooked tofu roast for Thanksgiving at my mom’s, and I’ve brought pasta and pies to share during holiday events.
Of course, be mindful of potential food allergens/sensitivities before sharing food with others. But you’ll never guess how many family members, who don’t know I’m plant-based, enjoyed my vegan dishes and came back for seconds (hint, it’s a lot).
They’ll Call up the Restaurant Beforehand
Or they’ll recommend one in advance. And if it’s a restaurant that’s plant-based friendly, that’s a pretty good giveaway.
However, contrary to popular belief, there’s almost always a vegan option at any given restaurant (french fries or salad, anyone?) But if they’re going out to eat dinner, chances are they’ll want a more fulfilling option.
If their acting skills are especially on point, they may linger on the menu and give an indecisive “Hm” before adding “Oh look, they have a black bean burger, that sounds delicious” – insert tone of surprise.
But most likely, they’ve already called up in advance. People who aren’t plant-based, or people who don’t have food allergies/sensitivities to consider, would be surprised to learn how many weird or unnecessary ingredients are added to food than they realize (I still can’t figure out why they put animal fat in refried beans).
Do you know anyone that’s plant-based? If you’re plant-based, can you relate to any of these? Comment down below and feel free to share this story with someone you know who’s vegan.
TAMARA STUDER 
Leave a comment